Debbie has started going to the bi-polar family and friends support group in Wilmington, "just to be proactive." This means a lot to me, that she supports me in good times and bad. One thing she picked up at the meeting was a brochure linking smoking and depression. I never really thought too much about the effects of nicotine--all those little 'highs'--on the neurotransmitters in the brain that deal with pleasure, but it can really mess things up.
We have been completely smoke free for five days now, and to be honest it feels good. I feel like it's good for my brain too. I am less snappy and somewhat more clearheaded without the ebb and flow of nicotine in my system. Riding my bike (my new Maza...thanks Todd) to work has been good for the endorphins. I am stepping down and hopefully phasing out Zoloft from my medicine cabinent, and I can already feel my sex drive coming back, and I don't feel as numb to things. I am taking ginko biloba to help with this, and would like to see about going on St. John's Wort at some point. The less chemicals in my body, the better, I suppose. I feel like I'm getting back on the health track. It feels good.